The pursuit of being Dad So Kool… This is what I thrive on! This is what thrills me!
Making the Baby is the Easy ( & Fun 😀 ) part. It’s the steps you take after bringing the kid into this world, is what makes you a Super Dad. I am in love with the process of being a Super Dad.
In my journey of Fatherhood , I make a note of the stuff I feel is cool to follow to be a better Husband & a Father, as there’s always scope for improvement over the Husband/Father that you were yesterday. The ladies will agree here.
There will be several such thoughts presented over time , as they come along. I may even write a Book once I collect enough of these… who knows 😀
1) Don’t compare yourself to other Parents/Fathers. Do your own thing & enjoy Your own Journey. Bear in Mind, Everybody’s losing their Shit…Some just hide it better than others! This is true, not just for parenting , but most things in life. Moreover, Parenting is like your first day being a Pilot. Add to that , you haven’t even received any training for any aircraft on any Simulator ever. And no amount of Books you read or Videos you see or Classes you take are going to prepare you for what’s to come. Haha! Good Luck!! So ..Deep Breathe… Deep Breathe again and Do what you feel is the right thing to do. Follow your gut on most things. On others, consult a Doctor. Listen to other parents’ advice, but eventually do what You feel is right. It’ll be the right thing to do for your baby. A hundred Percent ! Don’t ever doubt your decisions and the steps you take , that work for You and Your partner.
2) Take adequate Health Insurance and an appropriate amount of Term Insurance. Can’t stress enough on this. Financial Planning is a super big part of being Dad So Kool! I will be writing a lot on Personal Finance in the times to come. For now, just highlighting in a Nutshell on the absolute Necessity of buying adequate Health Insurance for Your Needs to be able to cover Your Dependents and an adequate Amount of Term Insurance to cover your existing Lifestyle and take care of Your family , if God forbid something were to happen to you. While Insurance Companies will push you to buy a Term Plan with a sum assured of 15-20 times your Annual Income , however a good start would be 10 times your annual income Plus the Outstanding Loans being serviced as of now. Feel free to reach me for any queries on this. Happy to help.
3) Presence , over Presents . Your kids won’t remember the things you got them, they’ll remember the Time you spent with them. They’ll remember the things you Created or Made with them while giving them your Time. I always remember this by Lawrence J. Cohen – “Children don’t say, “I had a hard day at school today; can I talk to you about it?” They say, “Will you play with me?”. So spend time with them, talk to them, describe to them How Your day was, play with them. Your Time..That’s all they really really want & need. Everything else For Them is “Meh!”.
4) “Exclusive Breastfeeding” is no reason for You to continue Sleeping in the middle of the night when the Baby wakes up for Food . Get out of Bed & Get the Baby to the Mother! That’s the least we can do. Talk to your wife. Get her a glass of water or anything else that she needs at 2 am/ 3 am/4 am whenever. She’s a hundred times more exhausted & sleep deprived than You. So when she’s awake, be around & awake as much as you can. You’ll make some super sweet memories during this time. I guarantee.
5)Don’t assume that your wife knows everything about Baby care just because She carried the baby for 9 months. Understand that she too is as lost and confused as you are. Accordingly, Be there & Support. Like You , your Wife too is a new parent.. a new Pilot in the cockpit without any training. She too is as clueless as You about this new “Parenting” thing that you’re expected to be magically awesome at, Overnight!!! While initially, a Mother’s touch is always going to be more familiar to your Kid , but the journey is absolutely the same for You & Your wife. Your wife was not Born with Parenting skills. She too is learning it everyday, just like You. If the baby is crying and you don’t know what and why…..well, She too doesn’t! So, work with her. In moments like these You can’t just Hand over & run for cover… Be there.. figure out. If you’re clueless and helpless, be so, Together and You’ll eventually sort everything out.
That’s all for now on the gathered thoughts.
See you around!
Until then, Stay Fearless, Committed , Evolved & Involved !
Dad So Kool